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Questions to ask your crush: get to know them, text, flirt

Talking to your crush is easy when the question does the work. Here are 15 questions sorted by situation: getting to know them, texting late at night and flirting without saying it outright.

The best questions to ask your crush are specific and give them a story to tell: their worst first date, the song they hide, who they call at 2 AM. Ask one at a time and answer it too. Here are 15 to start; the Slow Burn deck in the capybara cards app has more.

capybara cards team · 2026-10-13 · 3 min read

Questions to ask your crush should feel like you just thought of them, even when you didn't. The trick is to ask about something small and specific. "Tell me about yourself" is terrifying. "What's the worst first date you've ever sat through" is a story they already want to tell.

Use them wherever the conversation is happening: across a table, in the group chat side thread, at 11 PM when "haha yeah" has stopped working. Ask one, react to the answer properly, and answer it yourself before sending the next one. That is what makes it a conversation instead of an interview.

And lower the stakes in your own head. You are not trying to find out if they're the one. You are trying to find out what they were obsessed with at twelve, who they text at 2 AM, and whether they laugh at the same things you do. Those answers tell you more anyway.

Questions to ask your crush

• What's the worst first date you've ever sat through, and how long before you knew?
• Which song would you be embarrassed for me to find in your most played?
• Who gets the call when something ridiculous happens to you at 2 AM?
• What's a tiny thing people do that instantly makes you like them more?

These are the warm up. Easy to answer, impossible to answer boringly, and every one of them hands you a follow-up for free. If the worst first date story is good, you'll be talking for twenty minutes. More of these are in the Slow Burn deck in the app. 90 more cards are in the Slow Burn deck.

Never stare at a blank text box againcapybara cards has Slow Burn for the flirty tension, Getting to Know for the early stage and Situationship for when nobody has said what this is yet. One phone, no setup, works on FaceTime.Get the app

• Slow Burn90 cards
• Getting to Know149 cards
• Situationship90 cards

Questions to ask your crush to get to know them

• What were you obsessed with at twelve that you'd still defend today?
• Which object in your room would tell me the most about you if I saw it?
• Which meal do you cook when you want to impress someone, and does it work?
• Which thing people always praise you for do you privately think is overrated?

Getting to know someone is about the details, not the biography. Let the small answers lead, and notice which ones they light up on. That's your next topic. More of these are in the Getting to Know deck in the app. 149 more cards are in the Getting to Know deck.

Questions to ask your crush over text

• Be honest, how long did you stare at that last message before replying?
• What are you doing right now that you'd be a little embarrassed for me to see?
• Which emoji do you overuse so much your friends have mentioned it?
• If I showed up with coffee in ten minutes, what's your order and what's your excuse for the mess?

Over text, one question at a time. Wait for the answer, react to it, then wait a little longer than you want to. A question at midnight hits differently than the same one at noon. More of these are in the Situationship deck in the app. 90 more cards are in the Situationship deck.

Flirty questions to ask your crush

• What did you notice about me first, and be more specific than "your smile"?
• Which of your friends has already heard about me, and what did you tell them?
• If I asked you to pick the plan for this Friday, how fast would you say yes?

Flirty works when it is light and leaves room for a no. Three good ones are plenty; the fourth is pushing it. If they flirt back, you'll know, and if they dodge, you lost nothing but a question. More of these are in the Slow Burn deck in the app. 90 more cards are in the Slow Burn deck.

How to ask without making it weird

Ask one question at a time and actually follow the answer, with a "wait, why?" or a laugh, before you move on. Answer every question yourself too, even the ones you asked; it tells them this is a conversation and not a test. If a question gets a short answer, don't chase it, just change the subject and try a lighter one later. And if you need help picking, a card deck does it for you: tap, read it out, both answer, no blank text box.